Advice about Friendships
Hey everyone, I could really use some advice. I’m friends with three girls, but one of them has been reporting things I’ve said instead of just talking to me about any issues. She often comes off as condescending and is quite sarcastic—it’s really hurtful. The second girl is more passive; she’s quiet and just seems to go along with whatever the first girl says. The third girl, however, is really nice, and I can tell she’s different from the other two.
My problem is that I’m not sure how to distance myself from the first two when the nice girl hangs out with them. I’ve only been at this school for about 4-5 weeks, and while I have a couple of friends in other classes, these three are my main focus. It’s upsetting to be treated this way, but the first girl doesn’t seem to think it’s a problem at all. Since I have almost all my classes with her, I’m feeling stuck. What do you think I should do?
It sounds like you’re in a tough spot, and it’s understandable to feel frustrated about the situation. Here are a few strategies you can consider:
Reflect on the Friendship: Think about what you value in friendships. If one of the girls is consistently mocking or putting you down, that’s not a healthy dynamic. It’s okay to prioritize your well-being and step back from relationships that don’t uplift you.
Communicate Openly: If you feel comfortable, consider talking to the girl who is being condescending. You could try addressing her behavior in a calm and constructive way, letting her know how her comments make you feel.
Focus on the Positive: Spend more time with the nicer girl and seek out other friends who make you feel good about yourself. It’s important to surround yourself with people who support and uplift you.
Set Boundaries: If you find that being around the negative girls impacts your mood or self-esteem, it’s okay to set boundaries. You don’t have to engage with them if it makes you uncomfortable.
Talk to Someone: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, consider talking to a trusted adult or counselor about the situation. They can provide guidance and support.
Explore New Friendships: Since you mentioned having other friends in different classes, make an effort to strengthen those connections. Building a diverse group of friends can help ease the pressure of the current situation.
Ultimately, remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. It’s okay to seek out friends who bring positivity into your life.