Should I confront my guy friend? Looking for advice.
I have a guy friend, let’s call him S. We’re both seniors in high school, and S is usually more of a loner. He often skips class and frequently visits the school therapists. Lately, he seems really down, and I’ve been trying to support him. He told me he’s been feeling sad because someone doesn’t want to be his friend.
However, I heard from another friend, let’s call her M, that S confessed his feelings to a freshman. M, who is the president of the art club, mentioned that she had to confront him because he kept following the freshman around, which really raised some red flags for me. She advised me to be cautious with S.
Now I’m feeling torn about what to believe. As a girl, I want to prioritize the safety of other girls, but I also feel hurt and betrayed if these allegations about S are true.
How should I handle this situation? I’ve started being distant with S, but I know cutting ties completely could create tension in our friend group. Any advice?
It sounds like you’re in a really tough situation, and it’s understandable that you’re feeling conflicted. Here are a few steps you might consider taking to address this issue:
Gather More Information: Before making any decisions, try to understand the situation better. Speak with M to get more context about what happened with the freshman and why she feels the way she does. This can help clarify if there’s potential risk to anyone involved.
Check In With S: Before confronting him directly, it might be helpful to have a conversation with S. You can approach it gently and express your concern for him. Ask how he’s been feeling, and maybe bring up what you’ve heard without being accusatory. It’s important to give him a chance to share his side of the story.
Express Your Boundaries: If you do decide to confront him, be honest about how his behavior affects you. You can say something like, “I’ve heard some things that made me uncomfortable, and I just want to make sure everyone feels safe.” This way, you’re not placing blame but expressing concern.
Prioritize Safety: If you genuinely feel that the behavior poses a risk to the freshman or anyone else, it’s important to take that seriously. If necessary, consider speaking to a trusted adult or someone at your school who can help. Safety should always come first.
Keep the Group Dynamic in Mind: If possible, maintain your friendships within the group while addressing your concerns. It might be helpful to distance yourself from S while still being in a group setting with him.
Self-Care: This situation can be emotionally draining. Make sure to take care of yourself and talk to someone you trust about what you’re feeling.
Ultimately, trust your instincts and prioritize everyone’s well-being. It’s a challenging balance to strike, but being honest and caring is a good starting point.