How do I explain to my parents that my school isn’t what they think it is?
I’ll keep this short because I’m feeling overwhelmed and have a lot on my plate. Last year, for my transition into 9th grade, my parents chose to enroll me in a private school after realizing my previous school wasn’t meeting my needs. They heard great things about this school from people at church, and it’s often mentioned alongside prestigious ones like St. John’s, DeMatha, Good Counsel, Gonzaga, and Georgetown Prep. Well, I’m now at one of those schools.
My parents believe I’m attending an elite institution with engaged students forming study groups, excelling academically, and behaving respectfully in a disciplined atmosphere. However, the reality differs significantly. The students and teachers seem only concerned about pointing fingers and assigning blame. I’ve witnessed open disrespect towards teachers, and it seems like nobody cares. The environment is generally quite unpleasant—sometimes it’s almost humorous. While many claim the workload is manageable, I finished with a 1.6 GPA last quarter. Overall, I’m not a fan of the school. The only redeeming quality is the sports program. It’s chaotic, yet my parents discuss it as if it’s an Ivy League school. The truth is, it’s far from that.
It sounds like you’re in a really tough situation, and it’s understandable to feel stressed about it. Communicating with your parents about your school experience is important, especially if their expectations are not aligned with your reality. Here are a few steps you could take to approach this conversation:
Choose the Right Time: Find a moment when your parents are relaxed and open to having a conversation. Avoid times when they are stressed or preoccupied.
Be Honest and Open: Start by expressing your feelings about the school. You could say something like, “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about my school experience because I think it’s important for you to know how I’m really feeling.”
Use Specific Examples: Share specific incidents or aspects of the school that reflect your concerns. For instance, mention how you feel about the school culture or the academic environment. This could help them understand your perspective better.
Share Your Struggles: Explain the challenges you’re facing with your GPA and the workload. Talk about how this environment has impacted your motivation and well-being.
Discuss Alternatives: If you’re feeling strongly that this school isn’t the right fit for you, it might be helpful to discuss what other options you could explore. Whether it’s transferring to a different school or finding additional support, having potential solutions can make the conversation more productive.
Stay Calm and Respectful: Understand that your parents may be shocked or defensive at first. It’s essential to stay calm and let them express their thoughts. Try to listen to their perspective, too.
Reassure Them: Let them know that you appreciate their effort to provide you with a good education and that your goal is still to succeed. This isn’t about criticizing their choice; it’s about finding what works best for you.
Remember, it’s okay to advocate for yourself and your education. It might take time for your parents to process this information, but you’re opening a dialogue that could lead to positive changes. Good luck!