I’m having a serious family emergency. Do I look like an idiot for asking to makeup an assignment?

I’m currently facing a serious family emergency, and I’m feeling a bit conflicted about asking for an extension on an assignment.

On Sunday night, I had to rush my mom to the ER due to severe chest pain, coughing up blood, and difficulty breathing. It turns out she has fluid in her lungs, likely caused by a pneumonia infection. There was so much fluid that the doctors couldn’t determine if pneumonia was present based on the X-ray or CT scan. They’ve prescribed medication, but we need to return in 48 hours for a specialist to drain the fluid. Unfortunately, they couldn’t address it in the ER that night. Once drained, they’ll test the fluid for pneumonia or lung cancer, which is weighing heavily on us.

I have no control over the timing of the procedure, and with my mom in bed struggling to find comfort as the fluid builds up in her lungs, we can’t postpone it. We didn’t have a choice on the appointment time, but we took what we could get because she desperately needs this procedure to breathe properly. To make matters worse, I’ve never seen her in such a bad state, and it’s honestly terrifying.

Of course, this is happening on the day I have an in-person assignment involving student presentations. The procedure is scheduled for 30 minutes into class, which means I can’t attend. I reached out to my instructor to explain my urgent situation, emphasizing that I have no control over it. My mom can’t drive, and hospital policy requires she be accompanied. Unfortunately, I don’t have any other family available to help. I’ve offered to provide proof of her appointment or anything else needed if I could make up the assignment instead of receiving a zero, especially since it’s worth 20%.

This is the first time I’ve had to ask for this kind of accommodation in school, and it was a tough decision. I expressed to my instructor how I truly had no other options and apologized for the last-minute email, but I needed to advocate for my mom.

I understand that many instructors have policies against makeups due to frequent excuses from other students, which can hurt those of us genuinely facing emergencies. I still haven’t heard back from my instructor, and I’m feeling uncertain about what to do next. I can’t let my mom suffer another day like this, but receiving a zero on the assignment could be devastating for my academic standing.

Update: Unfortunately, my instructor hasn’t responded to my email at all. I honestly don’t feel great about this teacher; I’ve had issues with her since the beginning, and she often comes across as unsympathetic. I didn’t expect a response, but even just an acknowledgment or a kind word would have meant a lot. Thankfully, our neighbor was able to give my mom a ride to the hospital, and a friend met her there to help her home afterward. Now we just wait for her results, and I’m hoping for the best.

One Reply to “I’m having a serious family emergency. Do I look like an idiot for asking to makeup an assignment?”

  1. I’m really sorry to hear about your mom’s situation. It sounds incredibly stressful and painful for both of you. Please know that you’re not an idiot for asking for help with your assignment. Family emergencies are unpredictable and can happen to anyone at any time. Your priority right now is your mom, and it’s completely understandable that you need to be there for her during such a serious time.

    It’s unfortunate that your instructor didn’t respond, especially considering the urgency of your circumstances. It’s disappointing to encounter a lack of empathy from someone in a position of authority, especially when you’re facing such a difficult situation. Remember that taking care of your mom and supporting her is what’s most important right now, and it’s admirable that you were seeking solutions for your academic responsibilities despite everything going on.

    Once everything calms down for you, consider discussing this experience with an academic advisor or a counselor at your school. They may be able to provide support and help you navigate any implications for your course. In the meantime, focus on your mom and her health—everything else can be managed later. Sending positive thoughts for your mom’s recovery and your peace of mind during this challenging time. You’re doing the right thing by being there for her.

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