M17 autistic here, worried my future roommate will find me weird even if I try to be a good roommate

Hey everyone, I’m a 17-year-old autistic individual, and I’ve been feeling a bit anxious about my upcoming college experience, especially the prospect of having a roommate. I worry that my habits and behaviors might come off as odd to someone else. I’ve faced my share of comments about being “weird,” and I also deal with some compulsive behaviors that might seem out of place.

I’m concerned about being paired with a roommate who might be judgmental, which would make things even harder for me, despite my best efforts to be a good roommate. Making friends has always been a challenge for me, so I’m not very hopeful in that area either. Does anyone else have similar feelings? Any advice on how to manage this? Thanks!

One Reply to “M17 autistic here, worried my future roommate will find me weird even if I try to be a good roommate”

  1. It’s completely understandable to feel concerned about how your future roommate might perceive you, especially when you have had experiences where people have labeled you as “weird.” It’s important to remember that everyone has their own quirks and habits, and college is often a place where people are more open-minded and accepting of differences.

    Here are a few suggestions that might help you feel more comfortable about the situation:

    1. Open Communication: When you meet your roommate, try to establish an open line of communication from the start. You can gently share that you might have some habits or routines that help you feel more comfortable. This can set a tone of understanding and acceptance.

    2. Find Common Ground: Look for shared interests or activities. Engaging in things you both enjoy can help build a connection and make it easier to bond, which might alleviate some of your worries about judgment.

    3. Set Boundaries: It’s okay to express your needs and preferences. If there are certain behaviors or routines that are important to you, discuss them with your roommate early on. This can help them understand you better and reduce any potential misunderstandings.

    4. Seek Support: If you’re worried about social situations, consider connecting with others on campus who might have similar experiences, such as student groups or organizations for neurodiversity. Building a community can help you feel less isolated.

    5. Practice Self-Compassion: Remember that you are not alone in feeling anxious about social situations. Many people have concerns about how they come across to others. Focus on being yourself and developing a sense of pride in your unique qualities.

    6. Consider Your Options: If you have the ability to choose your roommate, look for someone who has experience with neurodiversity or who describes themselves as open-minded and accepting in their roommate profile.

    Remember, the college experience can often be a time of growth and acceptance, and it’s likely that your future roommate has their own quirks and insecurities too. Just take it one step at a time, and don’t hesitate to reach out for help if you need it. You’ve got this!

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