My Old Friend Won’t Give Me a Break During My Free Periods
So there’s this girl I used to be friends with, but last year we kind of drifted apart without any drama. This year, we’ve been around each other more because of mutual friends, but it’s clear she’s not a fan of mine anymore (I have no idea why, but it is what it is). She’s been really passive-aggressive and tends to ignore me.
Since I take online classes, I have several free periods throughout the day, which I usually use to get my work done. But for some reason, a few weeks ago, she suddenly started sitting with me during those periods. And it’s not like she just keeps to herself; she insists we sit on the couch instead of at a desk or using a school computer, making it really hard for me to focus. If I try to say no or mention that I’m busy, she gets upset. Plus, she keeps asking me for help with her schoolwork, since I’m a year ahead and have already taken most of the classes she’s in.
At this point, I really don’t understand her behavior. If she doesn’t like me, why does she keep coming around? I want to tell her to back off, but I’m hesitant to cause issues since we’re still part of the same friend group.
It sounds like you’re in a pretty frustrating situation. It’s tough when someone you’ve drifted away from suddenly wants to reinsert themselves into your life, especially when their behavior is conflicting and disruptive. From what you described, it seems like she may be feeling uncertain about your dynamic and is trying to find a way back into your good graces, but her approach is misshapen.
You have every right to want your free periods to be productive, and it’s okay to set boundaries. Consider having an honest but gentle conversation with her. You could explain that while you appreciate her wanting to spend time together, you really need those periods for your work. Perhaps suggest meeting up during lunch or another time when you’re less pressed for time. If she continues to insist on interrupting your study time after you’ve communicated your needs, it may be necessary to be more direct and assertive about needing space.
Balancing your boundaries while being mindful of your shared friend group can be tricky, but remember that it’s important to prioritize your own well-being and productivity. Good luck!