To anyone feeling lonely in high school from an almost-25-year-old…
Right now, I don’t have much energy. Just a nearly 25-year-old woman reflecting on her high school years, which were tough to say the least. They felt isolating and draining. While some people walked away with lifelong best friends and even soulmates, I ended up with loneliness and a poor self-image. It took me many years to understand that I wasn’t the problem; sometimes people can just be unkind (that’s no excuse though).
Just because your struggles didn’t involve physical confrontations or blatant bullying like in the movies doesn’t mean your pain isn’t real. Your feelings are valid and deserve recognition. It’s often a kind of loneliness that doesn’t have a clear fix. For me, it wasn’t even about the typical “popular” versus “unpopular” battle. I would have been more than fine being labeled “unpopular” if it meant I had a steady group of friends who understood me. What truly hurt was not having any friend group at all—no sense of belonging, no “my people.”
If you’re feeling this way, please believe me when I say: IT GETS BETTER. Now I’m in grad school, surrounded by wonderful, kind people. While they’re not the closest friends, they are a consistent support system, and I’ve finally found where I belong. I won’t lie; the pain doesn’t just vanish as you grow older, earn degrees, and build friendships. So, take care of yourself. Reach out to a counselor or therapist to help you through it. And remember, you don’t have to forgive anyone unless you truly want to; you don’t owe anyone that. Some might say forgiveness is the way to go—maybe they’re right, but I’m still figuring it all out myself.
Take care, and always remember that you are loved more than you know. <3
Thank you so much for sharing your experience and insights. It’s incredibly brave of you to open up about your high school years and the loneliness you felt. High school can be such a challenging time, and it’s easy to feel like you’re alone in your struggles, especially when it seems like everyone else has found their “people.”
Your reminder that pain is valid—regardless of the circumstances—is so important. It can be hard to recognize that the emotional wounds we carry matter, even if they don’t fit into the typical narratives we often hear. It’s wonderful to hear that you’ve found a supportive community now, even if those friendships look different than what you once imagined.
You’re absolutely right about the journey of healing. It’s not always linear, and it’s okay to still be working through your feelings. I appreciate that you’re advocating for self-care and seeking help. It’s a reminder to us all to prioritize our mental health and surround ourselves with kindness.
Thank you for the hope you’ve shared—it truly does get better. Sending love to you and anyone else who might be struggling <3