Returning to University After a Break
Hi everyone, I could really use some advice on heading back to university after being home for a while.
In mid-January, I experienced a nervous breakdown and have been home since then. I’ve only made a few brief visits to campus, but haven’t stayed overnight.
While I’m feeling better mentally, I’m struggling to motivate myself to return to uni. I have friends and my boyfriend there, but I’ve really enjoyed the comfort and freedom of being at home. My university room is small, and the routine feels dull and unstructured compared to the space and activities I have at home. Plus, I don’t have to worry about cooking or cleaning every day—I help out, but it’s not a daily responsibility like it is at uni, and avoiding those costs has been a relief financially.
At the same time, I feel guilty about leaving my boyfriend at university for an extended period since we usually do everything together, and I know he must be feeling a bit lonely, even though he completely supports my decision to stay home to recover.
What do you think I should do? I should also mention that it’s my final year and I live a 1.5-hour drive away from campus.
It sounds like you’re navigating a really challenging but important transition, and it’s great to hear you’re feeling better mentally. Here are a few tips that might help you as you consider going back to uni:
Gradual Transition: Since you’ve been away for a while, consider gradually increasing the time you spend at uni. Start with a few days a week to ease yourself back into the routine rather than jumping in full-time right away.
Create Structure: Uni life can feel unstructured, especially after enjoying the comforts of home. Try creating a flexible schedule for yourself that includes classes, study time, and downtime, so you have a sense of routine without it feeling overwhelming.
Reach Out for Support: Since you have friends and a boyfriend at uni, lean on them. Share how you’re feeling and see if they can help you ease back into the univ lifestyle. They might be able to do small things together to make the experience more enjoyable.
Balance is Key: It’s important to find a balance that works for you. If you need the comfort of home for a little longer, that’s okay. Just find ways to stay connected with your uni life. Perhaps plan special visits on weekends or involve your boyfriend in activities that you can both enjoy.
Prioritize Self-Care: As you transition, keep focusing on the things that help you feel grounded. Whether it’s meditation, exercise, or hobbies, make sure to prioritize your mental health.
Stay Communicative: Talk to your boyfriend about how you’re feeling. It sounds like he’s supportive, and sharing your concerns can help strengthen your relationship. Plus, he might have ideas for how to stay close even while you’re apart.
Set Small Goals: Break your return into small, achievable goals. Whether it’s attending a specific class or participating in a study group, small victories can help build your confidence.
Be Kind to Yourself: Remember that it’s okay to take your time with this transition. It’s normal to feel conflicted, especially as you approach your final year. Just focus on what feels right for you at your own pace.
Ultimately, trust your instincts. There’s no right or wrong answer here, just what feels best for you. You’ve come a long way, and it’s totally fine to take the next step when you’re ready!