I feel so alone and like a failure

I’m feeling really isolated and like I’ve hit a low point. I’m not sure if this is the right place to share, but I need to express how I’m feeling.

As a junior, I feel incredibly behind. I let procrastination get the best of me, and I tanked my first class. I poured a lot of effort into a math assignment and was proud of my work, but I ended up with a B-, which left me feeling defeated. I’ve cut ties with many people in my life and stopped participating in outside activities, which has made everything feel so dull. After school today, I ended up crying for about an hour because I just feel awful.

Speaking in class has been tough for me, and it’s affecting my grades across the board. I see people trying to engage with me, but I’m overwhelmed and don’t know how to respond. I really wish I could connect with them, but I find myself shutting down—like today, when I awkwardly turned away after feeling bad about my grade.

I want to join clubs to make friends, but I fear being judged and worry I won’t find anyone. I used to be sociable, but after being bullied in 8th and 9th grade, I’ve become more withdrawn, which feels pretty pathetic. I want to be interesting, but I’m unsure how to go about it and feel like I’ve lost my motivation.

I’ve had some dark thoughts in the past, and it worries me that I’m slipping back into that mindset. I know I need to reach out and expand my social circle, but I struggle to find the right words. I was in therapy before, but I feel embarrassed to go back since I haven’t made the progress I hoped for. I also have issues with eating, and being very skinny makes me feel self-conscious when I’m out.

I really want to connect with others, but anxiety holds me back. My school is tiny, and with clubs not being an option, I feel like I’m stuck. I wish I could be like those people who effortlessly know what to say and have captivating things to share.

I just feel so alone, and without friends to help me distract from my worries, I bury myself in work. Whenever I get a bad grade, I end up harshly criticizing myself. I’m constantly scared that I’ll never fit in.

One Reply to “I feel so alone and like a failure”

  1. I’m really sorry to hear that you’re feeling this way. It sounds like you’re going through a really tough time right now, and it’s understandable to feel overwhelmed. First, I want to remind you that it’s okay to feel the way you’re feeling; many people experience similar struggles, especially during high school.

    It’s also important to acknowledge that you’ve taken the brave step to share your feelings, even in a space like this, and that takes strength. Flunking a class or getting a grade lower than you expected does not define your worth or who you are as a person. It’s just one part of your journey, and it’s completely normal to face obstacles along the way.

    You mentioned feeling anxious about reaching out to people and wanting to make friends; that’s a common feeling, especially if you’re dealing with self-doubt. Try to take small steps—maybe start with saying “hi” to someone or joining a conversation even if it feels scary at first. Building connections takes time, and it’s okay if things don’t happen all at once.

    If going back to therapy feels uncomfortable, consider talking to a trusted adult—maybe a teacher or school counselor—about what you’re feeling. They may offer support and guidance that could help you navigate these challenges. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not failure.

    Don’t forget to be gentle with yourself. It’s easy to get caught up in comparisons or expectations, but just focusing on small things you can do each day can help. Whether it’s setting a tiny study goal, taking a walk, or reaching out to someone, every little step counts.

    You deserve to feel supported and happy; please remember that you’re not alone in this. If you ever need someone to talk to, don’t hesitate to reach out, whether here or elsewhere. You’re worth it, and things can get better.

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