I’m graduating a year later than my peers, and I’m not sure how to tell my parents. They’re aware that I’ve struggled in some classes, but they don’t know just how far behind I really am. Since many of my classmates are sharing their graduation announcements on social media, it’s putting additional pressure on me. My younger brother is doing great at DLSU and even getting ahead in his studies, which makes me feel even more ashamed and disappointed in myself.
While my parents don’t typically pressure me to excel—as long as I pass—they come from a more traditional mindset and don’t really subscribe to the idea that “college isn’t a race.” How should I approach this conversation with them?
It sounds like you’re in a tough situation, and it’s completely understandable to feel anxious about sharing this news with your parents. Here are some tips on how to approach the conversation:
Choose the Right Time and Space: Find a calm moment to talk when your parents are relatively free and not preoccupied. A comfortable environment can help set the stage for a more open discussion.
Be Honest and Direct: When you start the conversation, be open about your situation. You might say something like, “I want to share something that’s been weighing on me regarding my graduation timeline.”
Explain the Circumstances: Briefly explain why it took longer for you to graduate, focusing on the classes you struggled with. Be clear that it wasn’t due to a lack of effort but rather the challenges you faced.
Express Your Feelings: It’s okay to share how you feel ashamed or disappointed. This shows your parents that you care about your education and want to improve.
Share Your Plans: Let them know what you are doing to ensure you can graduate successfully. This could include seeking help from professors, tutoring, or changing your study habits. Showing that you are taking responsibility can help them feel more supportive.
Ask for Their Support: Let them know that you would appreciate their understanding and support as you work through this. You might say, “I could really use your encouragement during this time as I work to get back on track.”
Prepare for Their Reaction: They may have questions or be surprised, so be ready to listen to their concerns. Remember, their reaction may not be as intense as you fear.
Follow Up: After the initial talk, keep the lines of communication open. Share your progress with them to help them feel involved and supportive as you work toward your goal.
Remember, you’re not alone in facing challenges, and many people take different paths to reach their goals. Good luck with the conversation!