I’m unsure how I feel about college

I’m feeling conflicted about my college experience. I’m currently in my third year studying accounting and working at an accounting firm I joined during high school. While I excel in the eyes of those who follow the traditional path and find satisfaction in my job, the overall college experience leaves much to be desired. The moment I step onto campus, I feel an overwhelming urge to leave; I dread waking up for classes. I genuinely enjoy learning, but the campus environment and some of my professors really don’t resonate with me.

I also don’t understand why my degree requires four years. I’ve spent two of those years on prerequisites like liberal arts and Africana studies, plus an art history class where I struggled just to remember the name of a Leonardo da Vinci painting, which ultimately affected my GPA. Why are these classes necessary for aspiring accountants? If I’m training to be an accountant, what relevance does studying 1300s Italian literature have? College would be much more affordable if we weren’t forced to take these unnecessary courses just to earn credits!

And then there are the professors. If I wanted to watch slide presentations and YouTube videos, I could do that from the comfort of my home! What am I actually paying for? It’s bewildering to think that people believe it’s reasonable for their children to incur $50-100k in debt just for a piece of paper that signifies they survived the process.

Speaking of which, I can’t stand tests anymore. I have one coming up in Italian literature, and just the thought makes me want to vomit—I can barely even open my textbook. I’ve spoken to my dean almost every year and even considered counseling at one point. My mom suggested I could leave after my first year when I broke down at work, but I felt guilty for feeling this way. I’ve tried joining clubs and getting involved on campus, but it always feels temporary, and I end up back in this rut again.

Honestly, I don’t think the university lifestyle is for me; I wish I had opted for online schooling to get it over with. I have an incredible scholarship—a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity—that’s kept me from leaving, but it doesn’t allow for any gap years or breaks. I’m at a loss for what to do. I only have one year left, but I feel like I’m about to explode. Normally, I’m a genuinely positive person, but this situation is really taking a toll on me!

One Reply to “I’m unsure how I feel about college”

  1. It sounds like you’re really grappling with a lot right now, and it’s totally understandable to feel frustrated with the college experience, especially when you’re already excelling in your field. It’s great that you love learning and have found satisfaction in your job—those are important factors to consider as you think about your future.

    The feelings you’re expressing about the prerequisites and the nature of your classes are shared by many students. It can be incredibly frustrating to feel like you’re spending time and money on courses that don’t seem directly relevant to your goals. While liberal arts courses can provide a broader perspective and critical thinking skills, it’s fair to question their necessity depending on your career path.

    As for the environment on campus, it sounds like it’s just not resonating with you, which is perfectly valid. Everyone learns differently, and if the traditional college setting isn’t working for you, other options, like online courses or alternative educational paths, could be more appealing.

    Considering you have an amazing scholarship, it makes sense that you’re feeling trapped; the financial implications can weigh heavily on your decision. It’s commendable that you’ve reached out to your dean and sought help, but if counseling hasn’t fully helped, maybe exploring different types of support could be beneficial. Sometimes talking to someone outside of the college system, like a career advisor or a mentor in the field of accounting, could provide new insights or motivation.

    You’re so close to finishing, and it might be worth focusing on that light at the end of the tunnel. Perhaps you can carve out some time for self-care and stress relief in whatever way works for you, like finding small moments of joy outside of school and work. That balance might help you get through this final stretch.

    Ultimately, trust your instincts. If you feel like you’re pushing against something that’s just not right for you, it’s okay to explore what else might thrive in your life. Keep in mind that you’ve already accomplished so much, and you have many paths ahead of you once you graduate. You’ve got this!

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