My $24,000 Scholarship Might Be Leading Me to a Major Life Change
Hey everyone,
I’m a 19-year-old sophomore majoring in Chemical Engineering, and I feel like I’m at a critical juncture. I’m sharing this after failing my physics midterm (though I still have a C overall), and I’m seriously considering dropping out. This semester has been a real struggle, so I apologize for the lengthy post.
A bit of background: I received an almost full scholarship covering four years of tuition, a year of free housing, and an extra $500 each semester, along with an outside scholarship of $3,000 per semester for staying in engineering. However, an unsettling roommate situation had a detrimental effect on my GPA and academic performance, putting me at risk of losing these scholarships. I was on probation last semester but managed to achieve a 3.2 GPA after moving to a studio apartment. Unfortunately, this semester, my grades have plummeted to about 1.25 (I have an A in one class but Fs in two others).
I’m battling everything from 8 AM in-person lectures (after biking 7-15 minutes in often cold and rainy/snowy weather) to severe burnout and undiagnosed mental health issues that have haunted me since middle school. I struggle with social interactions, face insomnia (yet somehow fall asleep when I try to study), and have poor financial management (I’ve gone down to one meal a day to manage my budget, but now I’m trying to eat 2-3 meals to avoid hunger, even as rent approaches $2000/month, and I don’t have a job or a car).
Given that I’m already on probation, I doubt I’ll be given another chance if this semester doesn’t improve. I’m really questioning whether I should continue down the engineering path, switch majors, or even leave college altogether. While I appreciate my $24,000 engineering scholarship, I also resent it. I’ve performed well in Calculus and Chemistry and never struggled in Biology, so I wonder if I should’ve pursued that instead. I excelled in a CNA program during high school, but now the risks feel greater than the rewards, and my GPA is suffering. Without a strong GPA, federal aid may not even be an option for me.
The coursework is incredibly challenging and requires a level of critical thinking that doesn’t come easily to me. I grasp the concepts eventually, but the time it takes me to catch up leaves me feeling behind and frustrated. It’s disheartening to miss questions on tests that I could easily understand afterward. The way some professors look at me when I ask questions makes me feel inadequate, and I’m often ignored in my attempts to reach out via email. It feels like they hold a superior attitude simply because of their titles.
I’ve been considering alternative routes, like certificate programs in fields such as dental lab tech or pharmacy tech. I’m looking for a job that offers a stable routine, devoid of the chaos of customer service or ever-changing responsibilities. Ideally, I want a position where I can work semi-independently and eventually afford a cozy place in a safe neighborhood, with enough income to buy healthy food instead of relying on cheap junk. I’m not asking for a six-figure salary or a life filled with travel and luxury; I just want to attain the basics and create my own space away from my family.
Additionally, I’m thinking about pursuing an online job, though my work history is limited to a few customer service roles (the longest of which lasted six months). I’m uncertain if employers would take me seriously, given my age and limited experience. If anyone has advice or insights on how to present myself for online opportunities—or which job sites are most effective for finding remote work—I would be extremely grateful.
TL;DR: Should I switch majors and continue my college journey, or should I explore alternative career paths, like certificate programs or online
Hey there,
First, I want to commend you for being so open and honest about what you’re going through. It sounds like you’ve been under an immense amount of pressure, and that can really take a toll on both your mental health and academic performance. Recognizing that you’re at a crossroads is a big first step, and it shows that you’re aware of what you want and what’s not working for you.
It’s clear that being in a major that you dislike is adding to your stress. If you’re feeling overwhelmed and constantly burnt out, it might be worth considering switching to something that aligns better with your interests and strengths. You mentioned enjoying Biology and having success in that area—perhaps pursuing a related field could spark more joy and fulfillment for you and help you regain your academic footing.
Regarding the scholarships, I get it—$24k is a lot of money, and it’s natural to feel trapped by that. But remember that your mental health and well-being should come first. There are often options available for students who need to change paths, so it could be worth looking into whether you can maintain any financial support as you explore new majors or career paths.
Certificate programs like dental lab tech or pharmacy tech sound like they could be good fits for you if you’re looking for stable, routine work that allows for some level of independence. They tend to be more focused, which might help you feel less overwhelmed than a full degree program, and could lead you to solid job opportunities. Plus, many of these programs can be shorter in duration, allowing you to start working and earning sooner.
As for online jobs, there are plenty of opportunities out there, especially for entry-level roles. Websites like Indeed, LinkedIn, and Remote.co are good places to start your search. Highlighting your customer service experience, even if it was short-term, can be valuable. Many online positions value soft skills like communication, problem-solving, and adaptability, which you likely developed in those roles.
Ultimately, it’s about finding the right path for you. It’s okay to step back and reevaluate where you’re at—many people change their majors or career paths, and it can lead to fulfilling outcomes. Seeking support from a counselor, either at school or privately, might also really help you process these feelings and make an informed decision.
Take care of yourself, and remember that it’s okay to put your well-being first. You’re not alone in this—I genuinely hope you find a direction that feels right for you. Good luck!