Is it normal for a teacher to feel shy around high school students?
I might be misinterpreting the situation, but is it typical for a 29-year-old male teacher to feel shy around his female students who are around 15-16 years old?
He hasn’t shown any questionable behavior and seems to be that friendly young teacher that everyone enjoys being around. Recently, during a photo session at school, we had to take a group picture with him. Normally, the teacher sits in the middle chair at the front, but he chose to stand at the back with the boys instead of sitting in the middle with the girls. I get it; he might have wanted to avoid any discomfort for the girls sitting next to him and prevent any misunderstandings that could arise from an unintentional touch or something similar. The photographer suggested he sit in the middle with the girls to balance the picture out, as is customary. Eventually, he relented and took a seat there.
What struck me as odd was that after the photo session, he wouldn’t stop “bragging” about it for a couple of days, saying things like, “OMG, I felt so shy sitting among so many girls,” “This is the first time in my life being this close to so many girls,” and “This was the most awkward day of my life!” No one really laughed along; we just exchanged awkward glances.
Come on, dude, you’re not 16 anymore! You’re almost 30!
Now, I could be reading too much into this; maybe he was trying to make light of the situation to avoid any potential accusations. I was one of the girls in close proximity to him during the photo, and each time he made one of those comments, it made me uncomfortable. He probably thought he was easing the tension, but it just created more.
So, my question is, is this behavior normal? Or am I overreacting by finding it strange?
It’s totally understandable to feel uncomfortable in situations like this. Your teacher’s behavior does seem a bit unusual for someone of his age, especially when he keeps bringing it up after the fact. While it’s important for teachers to maintain appropriate boundaries with their students, it sounds like he might have been trying to be relatable or lighten the mood, but it ended up coming across as awkward instead.
Feeling shy around students, particularly in a mixed-gender setting, can certainly stem from a desire to avoid any misunderstandings or false accusations, which might be the case here. However, his repeated comments and the way he reacted during and after the photo session could make his students feel uncomfortable, which is something he should be mindful of.
It’s natural to wonder if someone’s behavior is appropriate, especially regarding power dynamics in student-teacher relationships. If you or your classmates feel consistently uncomfortable with how he behaves, it’s worth discussing it with a trusted adult or school counselor. They can help assess the situation and determine if any action is needed to ensure everyone feels safe and comfortable at school. Your feelings are valid, and it’s good that you’re thinking critically about it.