Why Am I Feeling Guilty About Planning to Give My Friend a Negative Peer Evaluation?
I’m currently working on a midterm project for Business Finance, and it’s been frustrating. For the past few days, I’ve been reminding my friend to complete her part, but she hasn’t followed through. She often responds with, “Yeah, I’ll do it,” but then nothing gets done. We’re a group of four, and it seems like she only makes an effort to contribute when the rest of us are around, yet even then, she tends to disappear or claim she’s too busy. I’ve expressed to her multiple times that I’m juggling several other projects and really need her help to make sure we finish this finance assignment on time. So far, I’ve been the one putting in the most effort, and our other groupmates have even apologized for not being able to contribute more. Meanwhile, my friend is prioritizing other things despite the tight deadline we’re facing.
I find it ironic because she often complains about our other groupmates, deeming them “lazy,” yet they have been putting in more work than she has. Ironically, she’s worried about receiving a poor evaluation from them if peer evaluations are conducted.
I decided to reach out to our teachers to request a peer evaluation, expressing my concerns about one member of our group sharing the same grade as the rest of us. Despite my friendship with her, I don’t believe it’s fair for her to receive a good grade when she has barely contributed. The most she did was pop into a group call and mention she had been shopping all day, which was why she didn’t contribute anything further.
I reached out to her again to share my feelings, and all she offered was an apology after I mentioned the other groupmates had expressed their frustrations to me.
This isn’t like her. Normally, she performs well under pressure, so I’m unsure why she’s slacking in this particular subject.
It sounds like you’re in a really tough position, balancing your need for fairness with your feelings for your friend. It’s understandable to feel bad about the idea of giving a negative peer evaluation, especially since she’s your friend and you don’t want to hurt her.
However, it’s important to remember that part of working in a team is accountability. If she’s consistently not pulling her weight, it’s fair to evaluate her contributions accurately. Your concerns are valid, particularly when it comes to ensuring that everyone in the group is contributing equally, as group projects often rely on collaboration.
You mentioned that she’s not usually this way, which might suggest that there’s something else going on in her life affecting her performance. It could be worth having a more in-depth conversation with her to understand what’s happening. Maybe she’s dealing with stress or personal issues that are making it hard for her to focus on the project.
If you do decide to go ahead with the peer evaluation, just be honest and objective in your assessment. It’s about the work, not your feelings toward her personally. Sometimes tough love is necessary, especially in a learning environment. It could also serve as a wake-up call for her to step up in the future. Just make sure to communicate openly and try to keep the lines of friendship intact, even if it becomes challenging. Good luck!