Am I being too forward? Should I just move on?
There’s this guy in my class who caught my attention about a month ago. I can’t quite recall how it all started—it might be that I noticed him looking at me when I returned from the bathroom and scanned the room (I have a bit of a staring issue). We’ve shared these moments where we just lock eyes for about five seconds before I go back to my seat. At first, I brushed it off, but then I started developing feelings for him (I know, it sounds silly).
After that, my curiosity grew, and I began asking friends about him. I discovered that he’s really quiet. With my anxiety, I find it hard to approach him, and I even tried talking to him last Friday but ended up just sitting next to him instead (he’s in front of my friends, so it’s not too awkward).
My friends suggested I follow him on Instagram and other platforms, but he hasn’t followed me back. Now I feel a bit foolish, like maybe I misread the signals. It seems like he’s ignoring me—though I’m not sure what kind of person he truly is. Maybe he’s just as shy as I am?
He frequently looks around the room, and I notice him glancing in my direction during class, but who knows where his gaze is really directed? I might have jumped to conclusions thinking he was interested in me. We’re quite different, from appearances to personalities to interests. I know I should probably let it go, especially since nothing substantial has happened. But every time we make eye contact or accidentally touch feet, those old feelings resurface.
Deep down, I think I know the answer: I should move on. If he were truly interested, wouldn’t he have followed me back? My friends speculate he could be shy. Plus, my English teacher mentioned that he had his phone taken away, but I saw him using it yesterday, so that doesn’t seem to hold much weight. At this point, I just feel silly for thinking there was any potential there. What should I do now?
It sounds like you’re in a complicated situation, and it’s understandable to feel confused about your feelings and the signals you’re getting. From what you’ve described, it doesn’t seem like you’re harassing him, but rather you’re navigating a situation where there are mixed signals involved.
It’s great that you’re being mindful of his feelings and not wanting to overstep boundaries. However, it’s also important to acknowledge your own feelings and uncertainty. Here are a few thoughts that might help:
Assess the Situation: It could be that the mutual staring is just a coincidence. Sometimes people look around and lock eyes without it meaning anything romantic.
Consider Communication: If you feel comfortable, try to strike up a casual conversation with him. This doesn’t have to be anything serious—just a simple “Hey, how’s it going?” after class could open the door for more interaction.
Manage Expectations: It’s okay to have feelings for someone even when you’re not sure if they feel the same way. Just remember that not every crush leads to a relationship, and that’s okay.
Give It Time: Sometimes these situations resolve themselves over time. If you feel like he’s interested, allow things to develop naturally rather than forcing it.
Self-reflection: Think about how you would feel if you didn’t act on your feelings. Are you okay with just letting it go, or do you feel the need to address them more directly?
Ultimately, it’s important to take care of yourself and your feelings. If you decide to let it go, that’s perfectly valid too. Trust your instincts, and remember there are plenty of opportunities to meet new people in the future!