Navigating College and Life’s Challenges
I’ve recently returned to college, and it’s been quite overwhelming. I’m pursuing a degree in Engineering or something else that sparks my interest.
Thanks to my parents’ military service and my mom’s Native American heritage, I have the incredible opportunity to attend college for free—a chance that not everyone gets. I’m taking Algebra, English, and Engineering courses because I aspire to become an engineer. However, it’s been two years since I’ve tackled a math class, and I’m really struggling. I recently failed my math exam with a heartbreaking score of 9 out of 100. It’s hard to believe I could fail so badly, especially since I’ve always managed to pass, even when I faced challenges. The stress has been compounded by everything I’m dealing with right now.
My mom passed away last November on Veterans Day, which was a catalyst for my decision to go back to school. Now, I’m juggling college along with a myriad of other responsibilities. I work long shifts—12 hours for 3-4 days a week at Tesla—and I’ve been putting in overtime to make ends meet. I’ve had to repay my roommate for borrowing too much money, which created its own set of stress, although that’s finally sorted.
I’m also sorting out my mom’s bank affairs, dealing with the VA, and switching everything into my name, like insurance, which she had under hers. To add to the chaos, I’ve faced issues with my apartment management; they parked a golf cart in front of my garage, leading to my vehicle getting towed. I ended up paying $300 to the towing company, which feels really unfair. The rental office has been slow to fix essential things, like doors and appliances, causing more frustration. My roommate and I have decided to move out because we’ve had enough of these games. While I’m not thrilled about it, I understand his reasons, and I’ll be moving in with my uncle and aunt, which might lighten the load a bit.
Between all of this, I’m managing to keep up with my English and Engineering classes, but my math class has become a major source of anxiety. I’m considering taking a break this semester and trying again in the summer. Some days, I find it hard to concentrate, and the pressure can be so overwhelming that I break down in tears. With a family history of heart issues, sleep deprivation has been a real concern; there are times I even black out for a moment at work during night shifts. My breaks are spent either trying to do homework or catching a little sleep, and it’s never enough.
One last thing…adulting is tough.
Hey, I just wanted to say that I’m really sorry to hear everything you’re going through. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate, and it’s completely understandable to feel overwhelmed. Balancing college, work, and personal challenges, especially after losing your mom, is a tremendous load to bear.
First, I want to commend you for going back to college and pursuing a degree in something you enjoy. That’s a huge step, and it takes a lot of courage, especially given what you’ve been facing. It’s also commendable that you’re managing to pass your English and Engineering classes amid all this chaos.
As for that math exam, remember that one setback doesn’t define your capabilities or your future. You mentioned it’s been two years since you last took a math class, and it’s natural for it to feel challenging now. If you’re worried about your performance, consider reaching out for help, whether it’s from a tutor, a professor, or classmates. Sometimes just talking it out or finding a study group can make a big difference.
Dealing with your mom’s passing and the responsibilities with her bank and insurance, along with the complications at your apartment, sounds incredibly heavy. It’s okay to acknowledge that this is a lot for anyone to handle. Moving in with your uncle and aunt could provide some much-needed support, so try to look at this as a potential positive change.
Don’t hesitate to take a break if you need to and focus on your mental health. College will still be there when you’re ready, and sometimes stepping back can give you a fresh perspective. And as for feeling like adulthood is a bit of a mess—yeah, it can definitely be challenging and frustrating! But you’re not alone in feeling this way.
Please take care of yourself, prioritize your health, and don’t hesitate to seek support from friends, family, or counseling services available at your college. You are doing your best, and that’s what truly matters. Hang in there, and know that brighter days are ahead.