Is it just me, or what?
Ever since I started sixth form at the same school I’ve attended since secondary, things have changed quite a bit. For those unfamiliar, in the UK, we go through secondary school for a few years, then at 16, we either go to sixth form or college before heading to university (which is similar to college in the U.S.). Anyway, I promised myself that this year I would be different—I wanted to be the funny, social guy everyone liked. At first, everything was going well from September to October, but then it took a sudden turn.
I felt completely ignored, like I was invisible. New students who joined this year quickly became popular and made friends with everyone else. My year group has only about 22 people, and the one above us has around 30, so that’s only 55 students total. You’d think it wouldn’t be that hard to get to know everyone, right? But for some reason, everything just fell apart. I didn’t have any issues with anyone; it just feels like it ended.
I can’t help but wonder if I should have chosen a different school or if I’m the problem. If it’s the latter, how can I improve my social status and make friends for the long haul? I see myself as somewhat shy, yet I still try to be outgoing. Should I wait until we move to the next school year or make changes now? I have a week off, so maybe it’s a good time for a fresh start.
It sounds like you’re going through a tough time, and it’s completely understandable to feel confused or discouraged about social dynamics, especially in a small group setting like yours. First off, I want to assure you that it’s not uncommon for friendships to shift, especially during big transitions like starting sixth form.
It could be that people are forming new friendships and cliques, which can happen in close-knit environments. Don’t take it personally; sometimes, social dynamics just change, and it can feel really frustrating.
Instead of thinking about whether you should have gone to a different school or if you’re the problem, it might be helpful to focus on what you can control. Use your week off to recharge and reflect on what you enjoyed about being social and funny when things were going well. Maybe think about new ways to reconnect with your peers—try starting conversations about shared interests, or organize a casual get-together where everyone can hang out.
Also, keep in mind that building strong friendships takes time. Sometimes people need to see you consistently before they feel comfortable opening up or including you. Don’t hesitate to be yourself, even if you feel shy sometimes. Authenticity can really attract others.
If things still feel off, don’t hesitate to reach out to a trusted teacher or counselor for advice; they might have valuable insights or suggestions. Remember, it’s okay to take things one step at a time, and it’s absolutely okay to prioritize your own wellbeing over fitting into a certain social mold. You’ve got this!