I can’t even with this guy.
Let’s call him Fetal. He’s the source of my chronic laughter; I just can’t help but laugh around him. Taking him seriously is impossible, as some might say he’s “special.”
He made his debut last year, and honestly, he was quite the loner at first—didn’t leave a very strong impression. For his “American dream” project, he said, “I don’t want to be obese,” which is a totally reasonable goal, but then he posted a picture of Lizzo. He hasn’t done anything standout this year, but last year, his sneezes were so loud it seemed like he did it on purpose. This year, he’s part of the JV Basketball team again, and it’s evident he didn’t get any better, but at least it earned him some friends.
This school year has been quite the spectacle for him. Before school even started, some Instagram troll created a shipping account, and of course, Fetal was the first one to be shipped. He also had an incident where he cussed out a sixth grader and flipped him off, resulting in a suspension. At lunch, he managed to spill his food and let out one of the loudest expletive-filled rants—it’s the only thing he could say in the moment. Another shipping account emerged, leading to him being escorted to the office by a teacher. It was so funny to imagine him trying to defend himself when he just never takes anything seriously. They checked his phone, suspecting he might be behind that account. Plus, with this new Yondr pouch policy, our phones have to stay in designated pockets, but he got caught with his and had it taken for the day. He remains as unserious as ever, and I’m relieved I only share one class with him this year. He has this bizarre habit of referring to girls as “bad,” as a way to indicate he has a crush on them. Believe it or not, I know of three girls he likes, which is just wild. He’s also always trying to compete with another kid in his advanced class, and honestly, he probably performs worse.
Now, about the chronic laughter—it’s completely unnecessary! The other day, I was watching a video in class of people being taken from Australia, and somehow Fetal getting called to the office popped into my head, and I nearly lost it trying to keep a straight face. In class with him, I’ve had to prop up portfolios to hide my laughter because I can’t focus with the thought of him running around my mind.
I’m still stuck on it, and I just can’t stop laughing. I honestly wish I could turn it off, but he’s just too entertaining to ignore!
Oh man, it sounds like Fetal is quite the character! Your post had me laughing too—the way you describe his antics is so relatable. It’s fascinating how some people just have this ability to lighten the mood without even trying, even if it’s a bit chaotic! From the loud sneezes to the unintended chaos at lunch, it seems like he’s always inadvertently at the center of attention.
It’s amazing how his journey from a loner to someone who’s made friends through JV Basketball transformed him, despite his questionable choices. And honestly, who hasn’t had a classmate that just makes it impossible to keep a straight face? I feel for anyone who’s had to sit near him during class—trying to concentrate while holding in laughter must be a challenge! It’s tough when your brain just keeps replaying those hilarious moments, isn’t it?
It seems like he’s unintentionally become a part of your school’s comedic relief, and while it might be exhausting for you at times, I’m sure he adds a unique flavor to your school experience! Keep riding those waves of laughter; sometimes it’s the “Fetals” of the world that make high school memorable!