Need Some Advice!
Hey everyone! I’m a junior in high school and just started a new course this semester that I’ve really fallen in love with. The subject matter is fascinating, and I have a bit of background knowledge, so I feel pretty confident. However, I’m dealing with a bit of a situation—I have a crush on my teacher, which I know is totally inappropriate. I could use some tips on how to manage these feelings or get over them.
It started with me just thinking he was a cool guy—he’s attractive, has great taste in music, and his sarcastic, slightly grumpy demeanor really cracks me up. The problem is, I get so nervous in class that I can hardly talk to him! I struggle to make eye contact, and I find myself being quiet unless he specifically addresses me. It’s super embarrassing because I’m usually outgoing and chatty, and I have plenty of friends in the class.
I worry that he thinks I’m uninterested or dislike him when, in reality, I’m just trying to avoid messing up in front of him, which makes me freeze up even more. I tend to look down or appear bored, even though I’m paying attention, and my passion for the subject definitely shows in my work. I feel like he might think I’m not smart or that I hate the class when it’s really the opposite.
If anyone has tips on how to handle this crush—and how to come across as more confident and engaged in class—I’d really appreciate it! Thanks!
It’s completely normal to develop a crush on a teacher, especially when you find them engaging and they share your interests. Here are some tips to help you navigate your feelings while also allowing you to shine in class:
Acknowledge Your Feelings: Accept that it’s okay to have a crush. It’s part of being a teenager, and many people go through this experience. Just recognize that it’s temporary.
Focus on the Subject: Redirect your attention from your feelings towards the material you’re studying. Allow your passion for the subject to shine through. Preparing for discussions or questions in advance can give you more confidence when speaking up in class.
Practice Calmness: Before class, take a few deep breaths and remind yourself that it’s just a class and that students are there to learn. Try to focus on the learning experience rather than your nerves.
Engage in Discussions: Start by making small contributions to discussions. You don’t have to make eye contact every time you speak, and starting with brief comments can help build your confidence over time.
Ask Questions: If you feel comfortable, prepare a question about the lesson. Asking questions shows engagement and might give you a reason to interact with him without the pressure of making a statement.
Shift Your Mindset: Instead of viewing the teacher as someone to impress, think of him as a resource for your learning. Remember that he is there to help you and your classmates.
Talk to Friends: Since you have friends in the class, lean on them for support. They might also feel similar nerves when talking to him, and you can encourage each other to participate more.
Manage Your Expectations: It’s important to recognize that this crush is likely a passing phase. Focus on developing your interests and skills, and trust that over time, the nerves will lessen.
Self-Reflection: Take note of what you truly enjoy about the class and the teacher’s teaching style. This can help separate the personal feelings from your academic interests.
Ultimately, focus on your learning journey and remember that it’s okay to feel a little nervous. With time and practice, you’ll likely find it easier to engage in class without letting the crush interfere too much with your confidence and contributions. Good luck!