Struggling with Family Support for My College Decision
I wanted to share a challenge I’m facing. I live in Southern California and have been accepted to several universities that require me to dorm since they’re too far for a daily commute. The one I’m really drawn to is further up north, but I also got into another great school that’s about three hours away—both options would require me to live on campus. I’ve researched extensively, and I’m confident both schools are excellent for my major.
The real issue isn’t which university to choose, but rather my family’s reaction. Whenever I mention moving away or attending a college more than an hour from home, they shut down the conversation immediately. They don’t seem to care which school I’ve been accepted to; they just want me to stay home, and it’s really disappointing.
Am I wrong for wanting to move out and pursue my growth? To complicate matters, my aunt, who initially supported my decision to move away, has recently started expressing doubts. She keeps bringing up concerns about finances and transportation, despite my financial aid covering nearly 90% of my tuition and expenses. She’s now suggesting I go to community college and stay at home, even though she previously encouraged me to seek new experiences and opportunities.
Is it selfish of me to want to leave? I genuinely want to attend a good school that’s not too close, especially without support from my family. If anyone has faced a similar situation, I’d love to hear your experiences and any advice you might have. Thank you!
It sounds like you’re navigating a really tough situation, and it’s completely understandable to feel conflicted. Wanting to move away for college is not selfish at all—it’s a natural part of growing up and pursuing your education. College is not just about academics; it’s also about gaining independence, experiencing new environments, and learning to navigate life on your own.
While it’s hard to hear that your family is not supportive of your decision, it’s important to remember that this choice is ultimately about your future. You’ve done the research and found schools that fit your needs and goals, which speaks to your maturity and readiness for this next step. Their fear may stem from concern for your well-being, or perhaps a reluctance to let go, but that doesn’t mean you should sacrifice your aspirations for their comfort.
Since your aunt initially supported your desire to move but is now raising concerns, you might consider having an open and honest conversation with her about your goals and the changes in her stance. Explain how important this opportunity is for you and address her concerns directly, especially regarding finances and logistics. Providing clear information and addressing her worries might help alleviate some of her anxiety.
Connecting with someone who has been through this experience, whether a friend or a mentor, can also provide you with valuable insights and support. College is a significant transition, and talking to someone who has navigated it may offer reassurance.
Ultimately, it’s okay to prioritize your dreams and growth. Pursuing your education where you believe you’ll thrive is a valid and important goal. You deserve to chase after opportunities that align with your aspirations. Good luck with your decision, and remember, you’re not alone in this—it’s a common experience for many students!