My partner is struggling mentally while in university and is considering dropping out. What should I do/say?

My partner is facing significant mental health challenges while attending university and is contemplating dropping out. I could really use some advice on how to approach this situation.

This is my first post, and I’m feeling a bit lost. My partner has a history of mental health struggles, including a diagnosis of depression and bipolar 1 disorder. They have found it difficult to stick with the right medications, therapists, and coping strategies. Although they’ve made some progress academically, they still face challenges.

Recently, they connected with a great therapist and began seeing a psychiatrist who prescribed new medications. They even earned their associate’s degree after a difficult journey filled with setbacks. Things were looking up, and my partner decided to apply to a university they’ve always wanted to attend. They had applied before but couldn’t accept the offer due to their mental health.

Unfortunately, since starting at this new school, they’ve been feeling overwhelmed, both academically and emotionally. Their medication routine has also become inconsistent, and I feel like I’m running out of ways to support them effectively. I know I shouldn’t try to “fix” their struggles, but I wish I could do more to help.

I genuinely don’t want my partner to give up, but I also don’t want them to continue pursuing something that brings them no joy. If anyone has experienced something similar or has advice on how I can better support my partner, I would really appreciate your input. Thank you!

One Reply to “My partner is struggling mentally while in university and is considering dropping out. What should I do/say?”

  1. First off, I want to commend you for being such a supportive partner. It’s clear that you care deeply about their well-being and want to help them navigate this tough situation. Here are some suggestions on how you might approach this:

    1. Listen Actively: Make sure to create a safe space for your partner to express their feelings. Sometimes, just having someone to listen can be incredibly validating for them. Encourage them to share their fears and concerns, and acknowledge their feelings without judgment.

    2. Reassess Goals Together: Encourage them to reflect on their academic goals and what led them to pursue this specific school. It might help to talk about whether these goals still align with their values and current mental health. If they are feeling overwhelmed, maybe consider discussing the option of taking a lighter course load or exploring other academic avenues.

    3. Encourage Professional Support: Since they’ve found a good therapist and psychiatrist, it’s important for them to maintain that support. Encourage them to have open discussions with their therapist about how school is impacting their mental health. Their therapist can offer tailored advice and coping strategies.

    4. Focus on Self-Care: Remind your partner that taking care of their mental health is the priority. Encourage them to engage in self-care practices that help them, whether it’s exercise, meditation, or hobbies they enjoy. Small steps toward balance can be really beneficial.

    5. Share Your Observations: If you notice changes in their behavior or mood, gently bring these observations up in conversation. Approach this with empathy, expressing concern rather than making assumptions.

    6. Explore Options Together: If they’re seriously considering dropping out, help them explore what that would look like. Would they want to take a break and return later? Would they prefer to pursue education in a different format, like part-time or online courses? Discuss the potential benefits and challenges of each option.

    7. Be Patient and Flexible: Understand that this is a journey, and it might take time for your partner to find the right path for them. Let them know you’re there for them no matter what decision they make.

    8. Encourage Healthy Routines: Talk about the importance of medication adherence, a healthy diet, and regular sleep. Simple changes in these areas can sometimes make a significant difference in overall well-being.

    9. Support Network: Encourage your partner to lean on friends, family, and support groups, as connection can be incredibly healing.

    Ultimately, reassure them that it’s okay to prioritize their mental health and that there’s no shame in needing to take a step back. You’re doing great by showing your love and support, and simply being there for your partner makes a significant difference.

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