Title: Navigating Graduation Expectations and Self-Worth
Graduation season is often a time of celebration, recognition, and pride. However, sometimes family dynamics and external symbols can create unexpected emotional challenges. Recently, I found myself feeling unexpectedly judged and disappointed by my own mother over something that I believed was never that important—graduation cords.
Despite maintaining a strong academic record, holding a 4.5 GPA and attending one of the top ten engineering schools in the country, I don’t have the traditional cords that many associate with honors or achievements. Our school doesn’t award cords for being in the top ten percent or for being an AP Scholar, which I am. I chose not to join certain honor societies, like the National Merit or our school’s English honors, because I didn’t see the value in paying for memberships that didn’t align with my priorities and because my activities and scores already demonstrate my dedication.
Outside of academics, I participate in music, but I didn’t take part in school music programs this year, so I wasn’t eligible for the tri-m music honors society. As a result, I was left without the symbolic cords many students wear during graduation.
When I shared this with my mother, her reaction was unexpectedly harsh. The look she gave me was one of outright disappointment, and it hit me hard—so much so that I was brought to tears. Her subsequent questioning about why I had no cords only intensified my feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.
Initially, I believed I was content with my achievements, but her reaction made me realize how much I was seeking validation. Now, I find myself questioning whether I am enough, all because I lacked a tangible symbol of recognition that some might view as a marker of success.
This experience has led me to reflect on how external symbols and family expectations can sometimes overshadow genuine achievement. It’s important to remember that our worth isn’t defined solely by such symbols or societal measures. We should celebrate the hard work, dedication, and integrity we bring to our pursuits, regardless of whether they come with a cord or an award.
For anyone feeling similarly pressured or misunderstood during special milestones, know that your value is not dictated by tradition or external validation. Celebrate your accomplishments in your way, and remember—you are enough as you are.