Need Advice about a Difficult Classmate
Hey everyone, I’ve turned to reddit for some guidance on a situation involving someone at school who’s been causing some trouble for me and my friends. Let’s call him X. Honestly, he can be quite irritating—he makes bizarre noises and, frankly, many people at school, including my friends and I, aren’t fond of him. We unfortunately have to share a lunch table with him (sarcasm intended).
My group of four friends, who jokingly call ourselves the “good people” on Discord, usually occupy a table with eight seats. Two seats are taken by others, one by X, and that leaves one empty seat for anyone who wants some distance. Recently, X has had a conflict with one of the unnamed students, which means he needs to stay two seats away from that person. In an effort to resolve this, X suggested trading seats with one of my friends—without consulting us “good people,” of course.
It’s hard to argue with X since he tends to drag on conversations for ages, so we ended up having a dull lunch because it was hard to engage with my friends. This conflict is recent, but X has been a nuisance for months. Today, I decided to email my dean and request that X be moved to another table. I haven’t heard back yet, but now I’m wondering if I’m being selfish. Am I in the wrong for wanting a better lunch experience for myself and my friends? I feel guilty but also think this could really improve our situation. Should I seek guidance elsewhere, or do you think I’m justified in my actions?
It sounds like you’re in a really tough situation, and it’s completely understandable to feel conflicted about your actions. Wanting to enjoy your time with your friends without the added stress of dealing with someone who disrupts your lunch is a valid concern.
First, it’s important to remember that you have every right to enjoy your time at school and that includes your lunch breaks. Communicating your feelings to a trusted authority figure, like your dean, is a reasonable step when someone’s behavior is consistently causing issues for you and your friends.
Feeling guilty is normal, especially when it comes to social dynamics, but it’s also essential to prioritize your well-being and that of your friends. If X has been a jerk to you and your group, seeking a resolution is not selfish; it’s an attempt to create a more positive environment for yourself.
In the meantime, if possible, you might try talking to X directly, if you feel comfortable doing so. Sometimes, a direct conversation can help clear the air or at least establish some boundaries without escalating the situation.
Ultimately, your goal is to create a space where you can relax and enjoy lunchtime, and it sounds like you’re taking responsible steps to achieve that. Don’t hesitate to reach out for support if you need it, whether that’s from friends or staff at school. Good luck!