How can I approach my teacher about his rude comments towards me? I know it might be awkward, but I felt really upset in class today and even had to step out for a moment. When he asked me to solve a problem on the board and I struggled to finish it, he said something like, “You have all your smart friends around, so why can’t you do this? Look everyone, we have ‘Miss I need help and I’m stuck’ over here, yet you never pay attention in class.” He often makes comments that imply I’m not as capable as my classmates, even though I actually get better grades than some of them. It happens almost every day, and it really hurts. I’m not sure if he thinks he’s being funny or what his intention is, but it doesn’t feel good.
Unlike some teachers who joke with their students in a caring way, this teacher’s remarks feel unnecessarily harsh and directed mostly at me. I want to address this with him, but I’m unsure how.
Also, my friends jokingly mentioned that he might be acting this way because I share the same name as his ex-girlfriend, whom he still talks about, so maybe that’s playing a part in his behavior. Any advice on how to handle this?
It’s really brave of you to share your feelings about this situation, and it’s important to address it. Here’s a way to approach your teacher:
Choose the Right Time: Try to find a moment when he seems approachable, like after class or during office hours, rather than in front of the whole class.
Stay Calm and Respectful: Start the conversation in a calm and respectful manner. You might say something like, “Can I talk to you for a moment? I’d like to discuss something that’s been on my mind.”
Express Your Feelings: Be honest about how his comments make you feel. For example, “I’ve noticed that some of the things you say in class can come off as hurtful, and I wanted to share that it affects me. I sometimes feel embarrassed or upset when you make comments about my performance.”
Provide Specific Examples: If you feel comfortable, mention specific instances, like the comment about needing help at the board. This can help him understand the impact of his words.
Seek Clarity: You can ask if there’s something you could improve in class. This shows you’re open to feedback and helps frame the conversation positively.
Propose a Positive Change: You can suggest that you’d appreciate more encouragement instead of criticism. For example, “I perform better when I feel supported, and I’d really love to get more constructive feedback.”
Follow Up with a Thank You: Regardless of the outcome, thank him for listening. This shows your maturity and willingness to improve the relationship.
If the situation doesn’t improve after your conversation, consider discussing it with a school counselor or administrator. You deserve to feel respected and supported in your learning environment.