Need Help Approaching a Girl…
There’s this girl I really like, and I want to approach her and express my feelings, but I’m feeling really anxious about it. A lot of people keep saying, “Just talk to her!” but my mind keeps telling me, “What if she thinks I’m weird?” When I see her at school, I tend to stay quiet because I feel insecure, even though I genuinely care about others and want to be there for people. I just worry about how they’ll perceive me.
She often has a smile on her face, and although she’s quiet, I’ve noticed that she opens up with her friends in the two classes we share. I’m not sure where to begin. I know I need to take small steps, but overcoming my fear of approaching her feels overwhelming. I’ve liked her since September, and we’ve never really talked—it’s been at least five months. She’s well-known but not exactly part of the popular crowd.
I want to know how I can get her to notice me and eventually talk to her. I’m really interested in building a meaningful relationship, but I could use some guidance. Some have called her a “pick me,” but I don’t see her that way. I’m not popular, but I’m not unpopular either, so I’m just uncertain about how to approach this. Any advice?
It sounds like you’re really putting a lot of thought into this, which is great! Here are some steps you can take to help you get more comfortable approaching her:
Start Small: Instead of thinking about telling her you like her right away, start with casual conversations. A simple “Hi” or “How’s your day going?” can be a good opener. The goal here is to get used to talking to her without the pressure of revealing your feelings right away.
Find Common Ground: Since you have classes together, try to bring up something you’re both experiencing, like an assignment or a class topic. This can make it easier to transition into a conversation and help you both connect over shared experiences.
Use Body Language: Smile when you talk to her. Positive body language can make you seem more approachable and can help put both of you at ease.
Be Authentic: Don’t feel like you have to be someone you’re not. Just be yourself! Share something you’re passionate about or interested in—authenticity can be really attractive.
Practice: If you’re really nervous about talking to her, practice what you want to say. You could even practice with a friend to get more comfortable. It may not go perfectly, and that’s okay—everyone has awkward moments!
Build Confidence Gradually: It can be helpful to push yourself just a little bit outside of your comfort zone. The more small interactions you have, the more confident you may feel when it comes time to have a bigger conversation.
Be Patient: Relationships take time to develop, so don’t rush it. Focus on building a friendship first. This will give you both a chance to get to know each other better.
Accept Possible Outcomes: It’s natural to worry about what she might think, but remember that everyone feels nervous in similar situations. No matter how things go, what matters is that you took a step forward.
Ask Friends for Support: If you have mutual friends, maybe they can help create opportunities for you to interact more with her in group settings.
Whatever you decide, be proud of yourself for wanting to take this step! Good luck!