How to tell your asain parents that you got a not so good grade for exams

How to Break the News to Your Asian Parents About Your Exam Grades

I really need some advice. I have to show my mom my exam results in just a few minutes, and I’m feeling super anxious. I’m currently in middle school, and since my parents are Chinese, I’m struggling to communicate this in Chinese because my language skills aren’t great. Here are my grades:

(In my school, we use achievement levels (AL) for grading, with 1 being the highest. For Higher Chinese, the grades are Fail, Pass, Merit, and Distinction, with D being the best.)

  • English: 31/40 (77/100, AL 4)
  • Math: 27/35 (77/100, AL 4)
  • Science: 28.5/100 (96/100, AL 1)
  • Standard Chinese: 36/40 (92/100, AL 1)
  • Higher Chinese: 20/30 (66/100, Merit)

Total: AL 10, Merit

It doesn’t look too horrible when it’s written out, but it’s still my lowest performance yet. I would really appreciate any tips on how to approach this conversation and what to say to her. I’m feeling overwhelmed. 😭

One Reply to “How to tell your asain parents that you got a not so good grade for exams”

  1. It’s understandable to feel anxious about sharing your grades, especially when you’re worried about your parents’ reactions. Here are some steps you can take to help make the conversation a little easier:

    1. Prepare Yourself: Take a deep breath and remind yourself that everyone has ups and downs in their academic journey. It’s okay to have less-than-perfect grades sometimes.

    2. Be Honest: When you talk to your mom, be straightforward about your grades. You could say something like, “妈妈,我想和你谈谈我的考试成绩” (Mom, I want to talk to you about my exam results).

    3. Share the Grades Calmly: Present the grades clearly. You can start with your stronger subjects and then talk about the ones you didn’t do as well in. For example:

    4. “科学我得了AL 1” (For Science, I got AL 1)
    5. “中文也得了AL 1” (For Chinese, I also got AL 1)
    6. “但是我的数学和高级中文分数不太好,得了Merit” (But my Math and Higher Chinese scores are not great and I got Merit).

    7. Express Your Feelings: Share how you feel about the results. You might say, “我对我的成绩很失望,我会努力改善” (I am disappointed with my grades, and I will work hard to improve).

    8. Talk About Your Plan: Let her know what you plan to do to improve. You could say, “我可以请老师帮忙,或者参加学习小组” (I can ask teachers for help or join a study group).

    9. Stay Calm and Listen: Prepare for any reaction she may have, and be ready to listen. She may ask you questions, and it’s important to stay calm and answer them honestly.

    10. Express Your Commitment: Reassure her that you’re committed to doing better. This shows that you’re taking your education seriously.

    Remember, parents often want to see their children succeed, and they will appreciate your honesty and your willingness to improve. Good luck!

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