My partner is struggling mentally while in university and is considering dropping out. What should I do/say?

Seeking Advice: Supporting My Partner Through University Struggles

This is my first time posting, and I really need some guidance. My partner has faced mental health challenges for a while, having been diagnosed with depression and bipolar 1 disorder. They’ve had a tough time finding the right medications, connecting with the right therapist and psychiatrist, and establishing healthy coping mechanisms that they can stick to. On top of that, they’ve struggled to achieve their academic goals.

A couple of months ago, things seemed to be improving. They found a wonderful therapist and a psychiatrist who helped them with new medications. They even earned their associate’s degree after a difficult cycle of dropping out, which was a significant accomplishment for them. Feeling positive about their progress, they decided to apply to a university they’ve always dreamed of attending to pursue a bachelor’s degree. In the past, they had turned down offers from this school due to their mental health, but this time, they were determined to move forward.

Unfortunately, the pressures of university life have started to weigh heavily on them. They’ve been experiencing academic and mental struggles for the past month, and their consistency with medication has slipped. I often feel helpless, as it seems I’m repeating the same supportive phrases without seeing any change. While I know I can’t fix their issues, I wish I could do more to help.

I don’t want my partner to give up on their dreams, but I also don’t want them to feel trapped in a situation that no longer brings them happiness. If anyone has gone through something similar or has advice on how I can better support my partner during this difficult time, I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you!

One Reply to “My partner is struggling mentally while in university and is considering dropping out. What should I do/say?”

  1. It sounds like you’re in a really challenging situation, and it’s clear you care deeply about your partner’s well-being. Supporting someone with mental health struggles can be tough, especially when they face significant challenges like your partner does. Here are a few suggestions that might help you navigate this situation:

    1. Listen and Validate: Sometimes, simply being there to listen can be a huge comfort. Let your partner express their feelings without judgment. Validate their struggles by acknowledging how difficult this time is for them.

    2. Encourage Professional Support: Since they have a good therapist and psychiatrist now, gently encourage them to lean on these resources. Remind them that it’s okay to discuss their feelings about school with their therapist or psychiatrist.

    3. Explore Options Together: Instead of focusing solely on the idea of dropping out, discuss the possibility of lighter course loads, taking a break, or even considering different educational paths that may feel less overwhelming. Sometimes, reducing pressure can make a huge difference.

    4. Promote Routine: Encourage healthy routines around medication, sleep, and self-care. You can offer to help create a schedule or reminders for taking meds consistently, or even engage in healthy activities together, like exercise or mindfulness.

    5. Express Your Support: Remind them that you’ll be there for them no matter what decision they make. It’s important that they know they have your unconditional support, whether they choose to continue school or take a step back.

    6. Avoid Pressure: While you may want to encourage them to stay in school, it’s also crucial to avoid pushing them if they truly feel overwhelmed. Help them weigh their options without feeling pressured.

    7. Focus on Self-Care: Encourage activities that promote well-being without the stress of academic performance. This can be engaging in hobbies, spending time outdoors, or simply taking time to rest.

    8. Check-In Regularly: Keep the lines of communication open. Regularly ask how they’re feeling and show that you’re invested in their well-being.

    Remember, you’re not alone in this, and it’s okay to seek support for yourself as well. Supporting a partner with mental health challenges can take a toll on your own mental health, so ensure you’re also taking care of yourself during this time.

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