I want to embrace a more assertive side of myself. Typically, I’m not an aggressive or angry person; in fact, I’m generally upbeat and often feel a sense of guilt over my actions, which leads me to apologize for even the smallest things. My dad has noted that when my adrenaline kicks in, I tend to shy away from conflict instead of stepping up. Coaches and teachers alike have encouraged me to tap into a more aggressive energy during sports, but I’m struggling to find that balance. I worry about how to be assertive without crossing into anger, since anger often makes me cry and triggers panic attacks. I think my fear of aggression stems from a desire to avoid hurting others or being disliked. Now that I’ve joined a water polo team and my first game is on Monday, I’m seeking advice on how to cultivate a more confident, assertive attitude. Any tips would be hugely appreciated!
I want to be more aggressive
It’s great that you’re looking to embrace a more aggressive side in your sports, especially as you prepare for water polo! Remember, aggression in sports doesn’t have to mean being angry or hurtful; it can be about channeling your energy and determination to play your best. Here are some tips that might help you:
Focus on Your Goals: Instead of thinking about being aggressive, focus on what you want to achieve in the game. Visualize yourself playing confidently and assertively, going after the ball, and taking charge in the water.
Practice Assertiveness: On and off the field, practice expressing your needs and opinions confidently. This can be as simple as speaking up in practice or sharing your ideas with your teammates. Building that confidence can translate into your gameplay.
Use Your Body Language: Non-verbal cues can convey aggression without needing to be angry. Stand tall, make eye contact, and use strong movements in the water. This can help shift your mindset to a more confident and aggressive stance.
Channel Energy: When you feel that adrenaline pumping, rather than trying to suppress it, figure out ways to channel it into your performance. Use it to fuel your effort during plays, like driving toward the goal or putting pressure on your opponents.
Set Small Challenges: In practice, set small personal goals that require you to be more assertive, like initiating plays or using your body to protect the ball. Celebrate these small victories to build your confidence.
Embrace Your Style: Everyone has their own way of being aggressive. For you, it might be more about being strategically assertive rather than loud or confrontational. Find what feels right for you.
Talk to Your Coaches: Let your coaches know your goals regarding aggression. They can provide specific strategies to help you transition into a more active role during games while keeping it fun and healthy.
Stay Calm: If you start to feel overwhelmed, focus on your breathing. Take deep breaths to calm yourself down and refocus your energy during intense moments in the game.
Reflect on Fears: It’s okay to be afraid of hurting others or being disliked, but try to reframe those thoughts. In sports, aggression is often about competition, not personal conflict. Teammates and opponents respect players who give their all.
Enjoy the Game: Lastly, remember that sports are meant to be enjoyable. Allow yourself to have fun and be playful in the water, and find joy in the experience as you challenge yourself.
With practice and a focus on these techniques, you can develop a more assertive side while staying true to who you are. Good luck with your first game, and enjoy every moment!